“You are more normal than you think.” When I was in college I was involved heavily with Cru, formerly Campus Crusade for Christ. My first leadership responsibility was manning the book table. I found not many people realized there was a book table so I would write and be in skits promoting it. I got really good feedback from the students and staff, so I stayed with it. The best thing I took out of being involved with Cru was being discipled or mentored by one of the staff. “You are more normal than you think.”
Over the course of about two years I would hear this phrase over and over, “Jeff, you are more normal than you think.” In college I dealt with a litany of medical issues which caused me to feel more “abnormal” than most. My mentor was a cancer survivor himself, so he understood very well what I felt. Essentially, I did not feel like my feelings were valid and hearing “Jeff, you are more normal than you think” validated my feelings and I felt encouraged. “You are more normal than you think.”
All of this is to say that I have found myself more and more saying this to clients of mine. Especially with what has been going on with COVID19 people have been much more on edge. I hate that there is a stigma on mental health and people who seek counseling. Mental health is just as if not more important than going to the doctor for a cough or cold.
The other day I spoke with a client of mine who said almost got into a fight at the grocery store. This person is super sensitive to other people and her biggest fear is that she is going to lash out. She almost did. What brought on this instinct was another customer who was sneezing and coughing without covering his mouth or nose and this person was very close to her son who was with her.
Tearfully the client explained how bad she felt for almost getting into a fight with another person to protect her son. I said to her, “you are a very loving mother and your reaction is normal to protect your son.”
One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Ecclesiastes 1:9 which reads “what has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.” Whatever you are feeling now, know that someone has gone through this exact situation before. If you need help, please ask.
If you are looking for a therapist near you and a Google search is a great way of finding one. I happen to be a therapist in Charlotte, NC but am licensed to counsel anyone in the state of North Carolina. In Google, try looking for “psychotherapist,” “find therapist,” “therapy near me,” or even “counseling charlotte, nc.” If you feel like you have hit a wall you are not able to get past, call me at (704) 458-6298 or email me at jeffhelms@clearerthoughtspllc.com.
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