Have a contingency plan! A client of mine that I have written about before who is being treated for depression and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder has made slow, but steady progress over the past two years. This client also sees a psychiatrist who has prescribed this client some medications address the two diagnoses.
This client takes care of her son who has an autoimmune disorder which means she is always taking him to the doctor and picking up prescriptions from a pharmacy. The past few years, if the client must go somewhere that has a lot of people, this client will go early in the morning, around 7am to avoid crowds.
The past six months or so, the client has become more confident going to stores during the afternoon where more people are prone to shop. One of the reasons this client has been able to do well is that she thinks ahead and plays out certain “what if” scenarios. Nine times out of ten, the client will not have a problem and has a good experience. What about when a “what if” scenario comes up?
Even though this client has been doing well, she is still prone to having panic attacks where the main trigger is being around other people. Because of traumatic events in her life, this client has great distrust of others. A new trigger that has unfortunately become prominent because of the delta variant of the Coronavirus is when this client sees a person not wearing a mask, that’s it, she must leave the building.
A few weeks ago, this client had to go to a convenient store to buy some batteries. Convenient stores are smaller so being in one with other people can feel claustrophobic. Recognizing this, my client still went in because she just had to buy a pack of batteries.
The client went into the store, grabbed the batteries, and then waited in line. The cashier was slow, so more people were backed up behind, where two of them were not wearing a mask. The client said she felt triggered. These batteries were for her son’s CPAP machine, which trumped her anxiety. Still, the line was not moving, and more people backed up.
So, feeling even more anxious, knowing her son needed these batteries, if the line did not pick up, her contingency plan was that she would go to the front of the line, give the cashier a $20 bill for the batteries that cost $5 and say, “I am having a panic attack.”
Which is what she did. That may not sound like a big deal, but it was for this client. This client has been trust issues of people that she does not know that have resulted in her violently harming someone else she thought was threat when they were not.
What was a huge win for the client was that she got the batteries she needed, that she did pay and did not act on her fear of hurting someone else. I met with this client again and she told me the other “half” of the story.
The person who was the cashier for this store happened to be the store manager who knew the client and her history of anxiety. My client said the manager drove to her house to hand her the receipt for what she bought since another fear of the client was going to jail for not having a receipt for batteries that cost $1.10.
Looking back, this was not the ideal plan for how this would have played out. The client had to have these batteries for her son at the same time she realized an anxiety attack was coming on. What happened was her contingency plan.
Many times, going into a less than desired situation such as waiting at the DMV is next to torture. What helps to get through the process is having the overall goal and if something does end up going sideways, to have a backup. With that, is there something important that needs to be done that is being put off because of how unpleasant the process is?
If you are looking for a therapist near you then a Google search is a great way of finding one. I happen to be a therapist in Charlotte, NC but am licensed to counsel anyone in the state of North Carolina. In Google, try looking for “psychotherapist,” “find therapist,” “therapy near me,” or even “counseling charlotte, nc.” If you feel like you have hit a wall you are not able to get past, call me at (704) 458-6298 or email me at jeffhelms@clearerthoughtspllc.com.
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